Then she asked me why I brought up the uncle 2 weeks before. A little puzzled because she was in There and we spoke about it 2 weeks ago why. So i started to explain it was to show her that my d claims she is afraid of me yet not afraid of my ex’s brother when I’m the past he physically attacked and we had to run out of her parents house.
Really?! Wolf, we all called you on bringing up your uncle--it sounds like you still may not get why that was irrelevant and inappropriate in the context of that conversation. Wolf, I'm going to be blunt--I suspect the therapist's recommendation may not be as glowing as you hope. See if you can understand why you shouldn't have brought up your uncle. Show the therapist you get it. I'm worried you're going to lose these visits and then you'll be waiting much longer to patch things up with D.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
She opened the door, and started to yell at me in front of the therapist and my d I am not to talk her or her family. That this is slander and she is going to speak to her lawyer about this. And that I am a liar that he never did such a thing. I responded calmly, he never attacked you and we had to run out of your parents house? Her yelling still never, you are a liar!!! I said really l, what about him punching a hole in the bathroom door? She started to yell look what you have done!!! I said answer the question. Calmly, “did your brother punch a hole in the bathroom door?” Again yelling at me, what about what you have done!!!! Again I said calmly, I repeated the question. She replied angrily, yeah he did that but the kids weren’t around. I just responded, ok.
Wolf, what the hell?! Why can't you turn off the right-fighting, "calmly" or otherwise?! You really did this in front of your D and the psychologist making court recommendations?! That's not a good sign.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
I love her very much and I am very sorry you had to witness that.
Wolf, she didn't HAVE TO witness that. You could have stopped anytime.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
She also said that she wants to have the family to go through a psychological evaluation. I said that is fine with me. She said besides the alienation there is a very unhealthy attachement with my d and ex. So this is where I am at.
Wolf, I get you right-fought "calmy" while your ex right-fought by "yelling". I'd even go as far as saying that if you interact with her in a toxic way, she interacts with you in a super-toxic way. The problem is D is closer to XW. I don't see peace and R with D in your future until you learn to better control your side of the toxicity and stop throwing gas on the fire.
