Yeah, the tent thing? Your ex is a d!ck.

The night terrors? My oldest used to get them. Nothing was going on. We finally figured out that if we walked him to the bathroom, turned the water on in the sink and got him to pee in the toilet, he’d go back to bed and sleep soundly the rest of the night.

The negative self talk? That does concern me a bit - I think taking him to a therapist who would, in addition to helping him with his fears, be able to document anything worrisome related to your ex could be wise, just in case you end up needing it.

Honestly, I wouldn’t have told a three year old about the cheating and OW. I would have simply said something like daddy decided he didn’t want to be married to mommy, or better yet, mommy and daddy decided it was better they live apart. ( Because, although it wasn’t your choice initially, you did figure out pretty quickly that you were better off without that loser. ). I do worry that by telling him about the cheating, you’ve just put him at more risk of a negative reaction from his father if he mentions it to him.

Now - you mention you’re not sure if OW has been there lately - have you asked son? Because if she’s no longer there during visitation, it might explain his change in affect. Or maybe he’s just feeling unsettled because of the increased visitation time. Or maybe he has pinworms and isn’t sleeping well. Or maybe he’s developed an allergy that’s affecting his mood. There certainly are a lot of things that can go on with three year olds.

Document what the preschool is saying about his change in behavior.