@LH19 - I am trying to figure out if I'm seeing things that aren't there and I think the initial post was me venting. I have been doing full-time work in the day and full-time classes at night and honestly might just be burnt out in general. I need to find time to sit down and answer your questions very thoroughly because honest answers to those will probably tell me what I need to know. The current point of frustration for me is that she keeps dismissing the whole thing as "it happened a long time ago" and claims to not remember the months of hurtful interactions. She doesn't deny her infidelity but has taken a "we can't change the past" stance. She has brought up my infidelity from more than 10 years ago numerous times, almost as justification or an excuse.
Our youngest son has an upcoming heart procedure, so from that standpoint, "safe" feels necessary.
I think I have to consider my responses and what my boundaries really are because right now it feels like I have them and they're being trampled.. but without knowing them very well, I cannot fairly say that this is true. Thank you for the thoughtful and concise reply.
