Believe it or not, there comes a point where you hope your ex and her OM do not implode. When they got married, I wanted it work. I didn’t want my daughter to go through a divorce ( she was a baby for mine) and lose people who love her. I continue to want them to work. And they are, so that’s good. Him and I would never. He’s a really mean man at times and unless you just go with his flow, you pay the price. So, she can stand him.
Abs I would even make sure my daughter still saw her stepmother and her family if they did divorce and he wasn’t facilitating that.
It takes years and a lot of painful emotional work to get where I am. Not everyone does. Everyone doesn’t even have to. I still have triggers, they are just managed well.
You seem to have your kids best interest at heart. OM’s family seem like good people, even if they are clueless. And you and your ex can coparent.
By the way, my biggest hurt and pain came from the thought of another woman raising my child. Her thinking as her as her mother. And guess what. My daughter knows exactly who her mother is and parents are and what roles everyone has. Your kids know you are dad and always will. No if’s ands or buts about that
