Oh as far as that is concerned the IL's are super supportive of me, they have been through this whole thing. Once the Ex moved out the FIL sort of mentioned he would appreciate if I would come back and help with the kids and the electric bill until they moved out of state, he knows maintaining my own place on my own income is tough and its hard to save much extra so it works out great. I get to see my kids every day, save money, pay off things and help them out with their power bill. They have been spending more and more time in the new home, they have completed it and just are waiting for the right time to finally move away.
As far as the ex is concered there is ABSOLUTELY NO WAY I will EVER consider recon with her. After this past year of healing from this, realizing I deserve better, and being active with god so much more there is just no way I could ever go backward. I really cannot ever see a happy and fulfilling life with her.
Yesterday I went to the IL's for my sons birthday party she threw for him to help bring over pizzas and clean the pool and stuff for my son's buddies. I saw all the families we used to hang out with 2 years ago before covid. Almost all of them gave me a knowing kinda nod and were really nice. My sons soccer coach told me "I dont know the story, but I know the facts, if you need anything let me know bro, I can pick him up or anything If mom doesnt bring him to practice/games" I thanked him. The EW was neutral, mostly pleasant, the day was easy.
I went to a church after work to talk to a pastor about where I stand with god post-divorce. I told him the ex's affairs began 9months after we got married and she left this time for good. I asked him also because I wanted to know if my only shot at being married in a church and having that family and dream I wanted all these years was kinda blown now. The pastor mentioned that mostly catholic churches are the ones that dont allow it. But he told me based on what happened that as far as scripture that once adultery is commited the marriage is nullified in gods eyes regardless of the legal standpoint. He told me that he would me more than willing to give me counseling and if the time ever came to marry me to someone (in the church) he told me that although hanging in there and trying to reconcile for years after the 1st affair was never neccesary to fullfill my vows that god would bless me for not giving up and that even if I cant get that time back he will bless me in the future for hanging in there. It felt really good, I started to feel like "damaged goods" being divorced, that was a huge weight off my back and I felt a lot better about my future going forward.
Otherwise things are looking great! Kids are happy life is alright
T:11 M:10 K: D5, S7 BD: 9/1/20 WW continues to break up and recon with OM. I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021 Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21. Glad my D was not busted.
