Parental alienation. It's a legal term because it's an old, old game played by sick people during divorces.
Parentifying ... another term worth getting to know because that usually also goes hand in glove with alienation.
Regardless of what your husband is or isn't doing, this divorce is between the two parties who married - You and Him - not your kids. Keep your side of the street clean. There is no reason ever to include kids in the details of the divorce proceedings.
I get, more than you could ever imagine, the triggers pulled by defiant sons who sound just like their toxic fathers. My ex-MIL has never lost an opportunity to degrade me to my son. That's on her, not me. What I choose to do in response is on me. What she does is very damaging to my son. What I do would be even more damaging.
Hold firm. Vent here or to close friends IRL. Is family therapy an option for you and your son?
Most of all, trust in God.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
