Thank you so much for your words of encouragement, BluWave & CW. They mean a lot.
Still, I hate this roller coaster of emotions. Today at school was another tough one, seeing each other around; no chats, just polite hellos. Arrrrggghhhh!
Then I went to see my lawyer. What a lovely bloke! He was the one who helped get our marriage legalised in this country, and fought for my citizenship. Wasn't cheap but he did an excellent job then. I came away feeling SO much better.
Apart from the enormity of heartbreak, I have been so worried about the financial aspect of the situation, but when things are laid out in black and white, I realised just how lucky I am in terms of my own financial security. His advice? Do nothing apart from set up separate bank accounts and divide anything that's in it now. Keep a running check of what she is spending on an excel document, and when (and if) she files for divorce, then worry about the house part later. I know she doesn't want to sell now, and hasn't spoken about a divorce. Don't worry, I am aware this could change in the future, but it won't happen tomorrow. The sun will still rise
The lawyer has no crystal ball, but was optimistic. He pointed out our age difference. He is in the same situation with 12 years difference between us (the older of the couple) and our wives. It was almost like a marriage counsellor meeting rather than with a lawyer.
This has NEVER been an issue between me & W before - she always seemed the most mature of us in some ways However, she has never been alone or lived alone before, and I guess I have to let her take her journey while I take mine.
I'm still not drinking, apart from dinners out which are few & far between and still working out. Feeling and looking pretty darn fine.
W & I will need to sit down and talk money at some point, but I'll leave that to her for the time being. I'll set up a separate account for me tomorrow. L also suggested leaving it up to W whether to take all her stuff or not. Keep quiet until she mentions it again.
