WAW Hired a Divorce Coach (Cont9.)

[Ready2Change]

she has said that her and I don't work, that she can't get over the past (I'm not sure what that is in reference to),

This is the meat of your statement. This is where you need growth.

Just listen to her and agree and validate how she feels. She wants to be heard and understood.

The way you were interacting in the past was not working. Maybe just for her, but most likely for both of you. Maybe you always argued. Maybe you never argued. Maybe you didn't listen to her. Maybe you made it about you instead of her. When you change the way you interact, it changes the dynamics. You have the power to make things better.

Learn how women talk to each other. One is doing all the talking and the other listens and validates. Go to a coffee shop and sit behind two woman. You can learn a lot.


I agree that a statement like this would be appropriate:
"I get you miss the kids, and it bothers you that this hurts the kids and I."

I would focus on her decision:
"Making this decision must have been hard for you."

I would add:
"It's too bad we didn't work out. (Agreeing)"