WAW Hired a Divorce Coach (Cont9.)

[Ready2Change]

R2C - Yes. Per the book, not divorce busting.

It has nothing to do with the book. It is about how you are interacting with her.

At this time the last resort strategy in theory would be the recommended course of action. I’m not divorce busting. I’m looking for closure.

LRT is to be done after you have tried everything else. You have children with this woman. You are DBing for them. DBing is about changing the way you interact with others. She is the the best person to practice and learn from. She is one big mirror reflecting things for you to work on and fix.

Recently we spoke.

Sounds to me like you broke a sandi2 rule. Talking almost always makes things worse. If she repeatedly insists, then your #1 job is to SFU and listen and validate. Do not linger. End the convo first. "Thanks for sharing, I got something important to do".

I said "don't worry, I want to be with someone that wants to be with me, I deserve that."

This can be your mantra. This can be something that you say to yourself. But you do not say these words to others (especially her if you want any chance of attracting her back (or other women as well)). If this is truly how you feel about her, take action (such as file the paperwork yourself). Less words and more action is always better.

I also questioned what holding off on paperwork would do if we weren't going to work on anything or have discussions.

This is R talk. You know the rule.