Yes the kids do have Dad’s girlfriend being forced into their lives. The upheaval of the family and Dad’s weird behaviour will take time for them to accept.
One of the big items, from my kids’ and mine own perspective, is the AP. My W’s (now XW) boyfriend was, and is, a person of significance in her life. Their (and obviously our) position in their Dad’s priorities changed. That is a difficult thing for ourselves and our kids to accept. A thing that they will need to talk about, and not to a peer friend. They need gentle guidance from their strong stable levelheaded parent. You are doing that by the way. Role model, being open, being available, honest, reliable, and so on.
These are all those small steps that lead to acceptance and forgiveness. And we have an opportunity to show our children, even older adult children, the way.
Remain a close family. You and your kids. They are used to the closeness. They will find the next step along their paths. Be their beacon.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
