Hope - just to clarify, my ex was not sharing the nude pics with them. My son’s girlfriend happened to see him looking at them as she had a view over his shoulder. Thanks for the book recommendation. Very helpful suggestion.
Bttrfly - my son is just not open to therapy right now, wish he were but he’s not. That said, he is doing an astounding job at processing and piecing things together. His ability to read the room is strong. He told me his dad bragging about 25 year old conquests shows his week self esteem and his need to get validation from women vs. from himself. He recognizes the behavior as pathetic. Pretty astute for a 17 year old.
Ownit - you nailed it, the quirkiness is now really tragic. Ex is clearly a total creep of a guy. Thankfully he has had decent role models through friends; their dads. It makes my son sad and jealous though that his dad is not at their level.
And KML - this is exactly what I am facing. My son is worried about building any kind of a future after this. He is scared by the prospect of this kind of unpredictability.
Bttrfly - as for me, thanks for asking, I feels tremendous guilt and sadness and anger that this has been heaped upon my kids. I worry a lot about the long term impact of all this.
But each glimpse of my ex’s life is a reveal. He is really lost. You have to drop all expectations with this sort of guy. It helps me create more mental distance between myself and him. I want him out of my life entirely; just wish I could brush him off like the lint he is.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
