Been here before. MLC? WAS? Not sure

[BL42]

Michka,

Well it seems my spidey sense was right, he met her last year sometime, the earliest date I can see him contacting her is Dec 22,2020. Thats based on the current phone number i have of the OW. I am making no assumptions that this is the actual date of first contact because who knows if she didn't get a new number or whatever. BD was mid Jan, 2021

So he has been having an affair, lying to me the whole time, even when I would ask point blank during those times he said he wanted to try about the extent of his involvement with her. He always said he never slept with her but I call BS.

Sorry to hear that. Unfortunately it was very likely there was more to it than he admitted.

Now heres where I may need the 2x4... I want to call her. I want the details, I want to know how long its been, how they met, if they slept together. What her intentions were.

So do I or do I let it all go.

The problem with contacting her is that A) she could very well lie about it just as much as he did. She has no incentive to be honest, so how do you really know what she says is true? And B) it could be a catalyst for the two of them to get back in touch with each other. She will almost certainly reach out and tell him, and he'll likely get angry with you and say you betrayed him (ironic, right?).

My understanding is you believe they ended it and aren't in contact at the moment. If that's true i say don't confront. If they are still in contact though, it might make sense to disrupt things.

I'm no expert though...others may have better advice.