Wow, if I have my exchange rates right, that�s more than I paid my attorney for my whole divorce. She is a $700/hr laser scalpel. �What�s my expected outcome? What do you propose? How much would that cost me? What if I do nothing?� It�s true I or a paralegal do any legwork because her time�s more valuable. I was surprised your attorney was sending emails about utilities. If mine spent 15min on the topic, even if I won, I�d lose financially. As with mechanics and doctors, be discerning in what work you approve. PS - This is another area where you can take ownership or let things �just happen� to you.
She charges 196/hr (272.50USD) but bills loads of time for emails. So she sends me and email and I reply and she charges for both. They don't use paralegals or secretaries, but I may need to find another lawyer as I can't afford this going forward. She had me believe that I had a good claim for maintenance so we will see what the court says, but I can't afford this and she knows it. She was supposed to let me know when the costs exceeded 1,600 but she failed to do so.
I have emailed her saying that she was supposed to inform me and to give me an idea of costs going forward for the rest of the divorce. I shall make some more enquiries on Monday with other firms. They were basically telling me the entire divorce would be around 1,500gbp but I think my lawyer got carried away with the maintenance stuff and the financial stuff after we realised that the stbxw had taken money from all the accounts.
Really, I wish that I was emotionally stronger. All this stuff battering me one after the other without any let up is totally awful and is devastating my financial position and emotional health - I haven't stopped shaking all day due to the stress and I haven't slept either.
I decided to start sorting some of the stuff out that the stbxw and I have been carrying around with us for years. Stuff that we have collected on our travels and things that we use from time to time but have boxed up due to renting houses that have no space to put stuff.
I'm chucking bits and bobs we haven't used for years, my stuff that I don't really want and I'm separating her stuff and keeping or selling the rest. I shall leave a whole load of stuff here for her to decide if she wants. I'm only selling my stuff. It's horrible as it's like saying goodbye to all those times with each and every item bringing back a memory - it's killing me...
This is the absolutely worst time in my life and I feel that I'm barley hanging in there, but I am. I keep getting these thoughts and images pop into my head that my wife comes back home. I know she isn't going to and it's heartbreaking and the first time I've cried over her for weeks ... Today, I've really missed her - the woman she used to be.
M(55), W(45) BD1: Apr-2011, BD2: 23-May-21, NC (15 June '21) Divorce Filed (16 July '21) --- When you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, you need to trust it's there.
