My offer was accepted on a townhouse near a location I wanted to be at, so I am very happy about that.

I have 11 days to get my stuff out of ex W house--what was our house. Sort of just dreading going into the house with all the memories but it has to be done. Other than records, books and clothes I only have a bed frame and a chest as far as bigger items to get out of there.

Closing on my new place is on August 9th. Once I get it furnished and livable I think I will feel a lot better.

Continuing to exercise -- I've dropped 30 pounds. At this point I am not even trying to lose any more weight yet it keeps coming off!

Going to therapy once every 2 weeks. Therapist says I am not feeling or acknowledging the emotions -- I am intellectualizing instead.

I am having these little "aha" moments. When W laid out the things she thought were wrong with the marriage I was so excited to have items to tackle. But those things were red herrings.

I had so much love and respect for her that when she would give me these criticisms I assumed they had to be valid but now I understand that, sure they are valid in the sense that no one is perfect but it was never about those things.

And everything she says about me seems to apply to her but even more so.

For example she said something about wanting me to "be more of the man" and do yard work and other traditional male chores. We have a small city yard. We pay a guy 30 bucks to cut and trim. This was never an issue before or something she ever said she needed me to do, but now come divorce time it is one of her complaints.

I thought "dang man maybe she's right. I should have done more of that stuff". But then, it just dawned on me-- why was she bringing gender roles into this?

My wife didn't want kids. Doesn't like children. Save for a few recipes she learned, I cooked every meal every night (I like to cook). If I wanted to turn this around on her I could say "You don't like children and don't cook. Are you a "real woman"? (I would never say such a thing)

There are just so many instances here where her criticisms of me seem to be obvious projections of her own faults.