WF, is dead on here. smilie, when these things happen they cause us to question EVERYTHING. Especially with the rewriting of history that the WAS does to justify their actions. In my sitch, my W had never been happy a day of our MR (according to her on BD). Now, I knew this was patently untrue and I could name dozens, hundreds, maybe even thousands of instances where I knew she was truly happy throughout the almost 19 years of our MR to that point.
BUT, her claiming that made me start to question if it was true or not. Maybe she wasn't happy at all from the time we started dating, through to getting married, being newlyweds, traveling together, working on our house together, getting pregnant and having our D, etc, etc, etc.
So yes her behavior right now has you questioning the basis for your relationship this whole time. Howeever, WF puts it beautifully: "I think you're time could be better spend researching how to deal with bouts of anxiety and stress."
BAM, there it is. This is what I was trying to get you to see with my GAL comment. You claim you are keeping busy, that you have time for nothing else, but then you post long posts on narcissism and how it is exactly what your STBXW is. So what? Even if she is a sociopathic psychopath, what does that change? In fact, the more you diagnose her the more it just proves that you should be spending every minute of every day trying to get on with your life, move forward, and stop fixating so much on her and what she is doing.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
