Picking Up the Pieces After WAW Goes Again #2

[smilie]

I know why she left. I was useless and had no income as I have a neurological condition and she decided that she wanted to be with the guy who has loads of money and flashy cars that she turned up in on the weekend to collect her clothes. In my book, she has prostituted herself

You have no idea why she chose him. You seem to be mindreading and villainizing her.

I didn't think that I was, it's just what I see. I suppose I'm wrong again then smile

You observed she's driving a new car, implied his car/money was why she chose him, then went as far as to say "she has prostituted herself." That leap requires some mindreading.

Maybe, but the dots aren't that hard to connect, bearing in mind that she deals with high-worth clients. Maybe I am wrong and maybe I'm wrong for assuming that, but I can see it as plain as day and by past experience, I have usually 'assumed' correctly.

The women I dated who had underemployed or unemployed ex's did tend to look for someone self-sufficient. There's a difference between dating for someone who doesn't decrease her wealth, and dating for someone who increases her wealth.

When you date real people, they often exceed your minimums in some areas. That may be the case with his flashy car, or maybe that is why she dated him! Neither of us knows.

I get that, but if you are in a relationship and the wealth has been minimal and an opportunity comes along to have a go at changing that but you'll have to put some effort in, why would you not want to do that? We were speaking of creating more income. She said that's what she wanted but she didn't act on anything or do anything about it with me. She repeatedly gave me the impression that she wanted to do it together, then didn't. So I didn't as I was waiting for her instead of just doing it.

Compare that with an opportunity that comes along where you don't have to apply any effort. What's more it's more enjoyable because somebody is pressing your buttons and making you 'feel' something that you haven't felt in a while because you're in a long-term relationship that you can't be bothered to ever work at - remember she had an affair inside a year of being married 10 years back. You don't have to struggle anymore, you don't have to have an older car anymore and you can live in a much nicer house with much nicer things - and all at a moments notice - out of one door and in to the next, and all you have to do is sleep with somebody for a while. How is that not prostituting yourself for a better life? Or am I missing the point entirely?

This is what really gets to me, as you can probably tell. This is the knife in the heart. This is what makes me want to just curl up and die. It's just seems so, so shallow. Seriously. Just knowing she has done this hurts bad, even now.

She does own at least one villainous action--cheating on you by having an exit affair.

And more besides, as has clearly been shown with some basic uncovering of records. The entire thing stinks to high heaven and has been carefully calculated and planned. However, loopholes were left and the tidy-up wasn't that precise maybe. Only time will tell.