. I told my son, open your eyes your mom doesn’t want you to play because it would be more time with me.
Wolf, I'm surprised. You were just speaking out against parental alienation. I get you're angry she won't take your son to tackle football, and additionally told him she thinks it's unsafe. Is it appropriate to tell your son what your wife's motives are with certainty ("Open your eyes!") when even you aren't certain? I don't think so. If you're having trouble controlling your anger towards her I would consider therapy. I'm seeking therapy. You have a lot going on!
As for her motives, it may be as black and white as she wants to make you angry. I bet it's more complex. Your son attending tackle football involves safety concerns, spending money, you get a higher share of custody, your son may get exposed to more negative statements about her such as the above, and more painful handoffs.
This is all stuff two ex's who can communicate can negotiate. Until you repair your relationship with her, I wouldn't expect her to do you any favors. Make offers that are zero-cost or slightly benefit her. I do think repairing your relationship even a little would have a huge payoff that trumps any tackle football benefits.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
So, his mom would have to bring him on her days. Or else he won’t be able to play in games... I said that’s ok that mom said no, if you still want to play I can sign you up.
I'm glad you figured out how you could do tackle football even if his mom doesn't bring him on her days. Like I said, as the coach, I could make 50% custody work for soccer and basketball with makeup practices.
Originally Posted by Wolfman
\Side note, the only reason I have to get his moms permission is because of the expense. We would split it, if she says no and I decide to put him in the expense is on me. Just wanted to clear that up.
Yeah, I had to eat the cost of most of my kids' activities for the first few years of divorce, because if I didn't, suddenly there would be other concerns. I shifted to a donation model. "I'm signing the kids up for X. It costs $Y. Feel free to donate whatever you feel is fair." Getting 33% of the costs reimbursed still helped. (:
