When I say basically the same thing back to her, she acts like I am accusing her of something awful and gets defensive. I don't get it. She gets to admit it, I just don't get to say it, not even out of a place of concern and motivation to help.
I have also expressed concern to our mutual friends about her mental state and alcohol abuse, in a loving, concerned way. W frames it as "You are telling all our friends that I am crazy and a drunk".
It's like "I am expressing the exact same concerns you have expressed to me! You know you need help and have said as much. So-- what gives?"
Lee everything you try to tell her right now is going to pi$$ her off. There is a quote a poster uses that describes how a WW feels about a LBS at the current moment "Every Breath You Draw In My Presence Annoys Me."
This will change in the future with time and space. Right now just wish her well and go out and lead a kick a$$ life. That is your only winning strategy because she will want to be a part of it or you won't care because you are leading a kick a$$ life.
