Smile, if I understand correctly, she said she didn't cheat 10yrs ago, and you believe she did cheat. We don't know the truth of that situation. We do know YOU were willing to build the last 10yrs on a lie.
This of course is a true comment, very true. But she could never remember where she lived when she moved out 10 years back, couldn't remember the street, couldn't remember the house that her 'client' had said she could stay in. I always thought this suspicious.
But you are correct, for sure, we only know my side of the story as fact. And yes I was prepared to live a lie simply because I wanted to believe that she was telling me the truth. I wanted to fix our marriage and be honest. Only she knows if she was honest and truthful and what her intentions were.
Originally Posted by CWarrior
Wherever you go, there you are. Why were you willing to do that? You might have had a good reason. You say it led to 10 good years for you before she gave up again and had an exit affair.
Why? Love maybe, commitment, the belief that working on a marriage is the thing that you do and that working on issues in a relationship is what you do to sort them out? I can't say the second time around that 'love is in the air' as a feeling for me at this moment in time - nor anger, nor hate, nor jealousy - just frustration, worry and panic and that's probably about the future.
Yes we've had a good few years, even through my illness, it's been a challenge but we have got some good memories to look back on and of course not so nice ones too. It's a shame I couldn't realise my dream for our life, but she didn't want it and that makes me feel like a failure.
M(55), W(45) BD1: Apr-2011, BD2: 23-May-21, NC (15 June '21) Divorce Filed (16 July '21) --- When you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, you need to trust it's there.
