Look, I get it. My W was a moral woman and mother. The MLC version of her is completely different. Seriously, a different person. They are like an alien in the body that we still recognize. And that is the problem. We still see them as them.
Originally Posted by LeeChild
At one point I went to another room and came back and it look like she was leaning over him hugging him. It was quick, I couldn't tell. But it didn't make much sense. If you are having an affair, you hide it. You don't bring your affair partner into your home with your spouse. I always knew my wife as a moral person.
Things will not make sense. Those in crisis or who have made the decision to have an affair are beyond the rationally reasoned view and well into the irrational realm. You are looking at the situation from your rational view, working to attempt to make sense of things. The understanding and reasoning you are seeking is rather non-logical at first.
Why would they do that? People hide affairs. Nope. A crisis person wants to get caught. Needs to get caught. They want to blame you. I know, counterintuitive. Doesn’t make sense does it?
It’s part to hurt you. Because hurt people, hurt people. W is trying to hurt you so you will lash out and she can further justify her position and emotions. Further her narrative and rewriting of history.
However, does it matter? Affair or not. This is no easy question to answer, and only you can answer for yourself. For some that is it, the deal breaker. Others less so.
Affairs are exceeding commonplace for those in a crisis. It is a symptom of the emotional train wreck they are running towards. It means nothing. Any affair or relationship born from a crisis is built upon the sandy foundation of lies and deceit. And like a foundation sand it cannot support much.
It looks like your business path is getting sorted out on Wednesday. Good job! There are many who suffer having that drag out for years and years.
Is this a separation agreement, a divorce, or some other arrangement?
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
