Yes and no! Yes, you’ve lost a partner you “need” and that will make life harder in the short run. No, long-term I suspect you will discover beyond the monthly check you don’t “need” her to survive or be happy. You cited her as an “obstacle” to starting your own business and now that obstacle is removed. Smiles, this could be an empowering year.
I agree with wayfarer to start with therapy. Find coaches in other areas, too!
As to fitness, my trainers find ways to make me sweat whether I have a cold, a stress fracture, or an impingement. To be clear, I’m not rich—I’m paying $70/month for 5x/week group training. Many gyms and PTs offer a free first training session where you can outline your limits and learn possible workarounds. Physical therapists specialize in working around disabilities and can be seen for 2-4 sessions with or without insurance. With constant and/or unexpected vertigo maybe, e.g., they’d recommend weight machines over free weights so a sudden loss of coordination wouldn’t hurt you. Maybe instead of a M, W, F schedule they’d have you train on whatever good days you have even if it’s only 90 out of 365 days. That’s probably still more training than the average middle-aged adult.
Originally Posted by smiles
There aren't any support groups, except a couple online which I gave up on as it was all about people wanting to take pills and I couldn't stare at a computer screen all the time because of my eyes.
That sounds like an excuse—eye fatigue as a reason not to engage on a forum about your illness, given you are able to engage on this forum to find ways to bust your divorce. It wouldn’t take too many words. “Hi forum! Does my illness mean it’s impossible for me to ever exercise? Has anyone here exercised after their diagnosis?” That may sound insensitive. I have an XGF with a neurological disease. I get both living an illness and being a caregiver are hard. Just getting through a day may take more effort than my normal day plus 2.5hr fitness routine plus chores. You may have to choose strategically one of your 180s instead of three. Breakups suck. I’m glad you keep posting! I do believe in you, though!
