She's Gone Again - 10 Years On

[smilie]

In contrast to your first BD, May already trusts her H less than a year back, despite pain and anger. After deciding to piece, they're facing past wrongs in therapy including the affair

Blimey, that's good. I suppose it is just a decision and as long as there is 100% honesty.

The Oxford Dictionary says to forgive is to "stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake." I hope you are capable of forgiveness. Forgiveness is not just for reconciliation.

I like to think I would be. I have been doing a lot of thinking about her family life, why her father went away, why her mother stopped speaking (literally) apart from to people she knew and then it was just a word or two and why she smoked herself to death. Why her father was living with another woman in a different town and he told the family her was living with "his mate and his wife" (funny how when his wife died, his mate left the flat and he got together with the woman), why nobody was permitted to go up and see him and he only came home for a day at the weekend. He always told people at parties and gatherings that my wife was his "favourite little girl". Arrrgh.

I think something went on in her childhood that she has repressed. First her father abandoned her at a very young age 3 or 4, but I can only guess at the reason why he went away (apparently he bought a business), but it brings shivers down my spine at the possibility of something more involved. This allows me to understand more and therefore probably forgive.