The point is, as you've realized, a cheater will find a way.
And of course, I remember this from when she was seeing me while living with her boyfriend. I just can't get after 19 yeas of being together, that she is sill like this. Why get married if you're not serious about it? She has never wanted kids either, more career-focused. It makes me feel sick just thinking about it. These bloomin' panic attacks are awful.
Sorry man, I can relate. In the thick of my sitch I can remember the "WHY?" moments and, looking back now, the panic attacks. The shortness of breath, the rapid heart rate, the feeling of powerlessness.
What I can tell you is that it does get better. As you learn to accept that you have no control over her, her actions or her choices you will get better at letting go. Ironically, letting go is what sometimes gets the WAS to start questioning if the choice they are making is the right one. I can't say it will happen in your sitch for sure, but holding on for dear life certainly doesn't help!
Lots of WSs in particular want their cake and eat it too. They want to go off and do who knows what with who knows who, but have the LBS waiting in the wings in case they change their mind. When you start removing yourself as Plan B, sometimes they realize that Plan A is all that solid!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
