She's Gone Again - 10 Years On

[SteveLW]

Hello,

Well the wife is 45 in August and I am 55, so there's 10 years between us which has never really been a problem, that I've noticed. We don't have any kids, which is a bit of an emotional subject, but happy to discuss.

We have been together since 2002, so that's 19 years and have been married for 11. We have known each other for 21 years in all, but it wasn't until 2001 that we started to get to know each other really well.

She had an affair with me prior to leaving her boyfriend and left him in the same manner as she's left me now and 10 years previously (2011).

So that's a very brief history.

Cadet must have approved this post (you are probably on moderation for now and your posts won't show up right away) after I responded.

Thanks for this additional information. Do you think she may have had an affair 10 years ago as well? What does your gut tell you?

I ask because occasionally we see sitches here where the WAS just has a penchant for cheating. As a TV psychologist I admire likes to say, relevant past behavior is a good predictor of future behavior. I know sometimes our love for someone blinds us to their faults, but maybe this is who she is? Just a thought.

The good news is that none of that changes what you should be doing. Which I spoke to in my first post, and that you are well versed in having read DR.