I was once in your shoes about 14 years ago. Coming out of a painful divorce with a looney bipolar (diagnosed) ex wife. I tried for months to save my marriage, I was a mess for a long time.
Then I met her. A gorgeous woman at work. She checked all the boxes I was looking for. Christian - check. Family oriented - check. Ambitious - check. Loyal - check. Physically attractive and fit - check. Looking back, I didn't stay single long enough to process my stuff, I was still broken even though I didn't feel broken.
This woman blew my ex out of the water! We started dating and she admired the hell out of me. We got along great, we had things in common, we worked out together, amazing sex. You get the point.
We started making plans for our future. We talked about kids, a house, which churches we liked in the area. Like you, I literally thought that God himself had put this woman in my life for a reason. All the signs were there, this was God's doing.
Things were awesome for about a year (you know, the honeymoon phase right?). Then some of my old broken behaviors started popping up, and she started to show red flags as well. 3 years later, after working so hard to make things work, we split up. Again, I was devastated. Except this time it was worse, wanna know why? Because what I didnt know was that I never processed the end of my marriage, I was now mourning two broken relationships.
Let me tell you man... mourning the end of a marriage is tough for anyone. But throw another 4 year broken relationship with the woman that God had sent me on top of it, was almost unbearable.
Ive been where you are, learn from my mistake and don't have a repeat broken relationship because you never spent the time alone processing your stuff.
