Maybe if you can do the math and show H that it’s only a small few hundred a month that would go to you, he’ll be less worried.
Great that you’ve got a job with a pension attached. I too found it freeing to not have to deal with my ex in household finances. (I always managed the money, and he wasn’t exactly a spendthrift, but he could blow a hole in the budget occasionally - like the time he came home with $5400 worth of two acoustic guitars without consulting me.)
Your second calculation is incorrect though - the longer he works, the lower your percentage. 10/30 x 0.5 x 0.75 = 12.5%.
At 10 of 20 years, you receive 1/4 (25%) of his 1/2 salary benefit or 12.5% of his total salary. At 10 of 30 years you receive 1/6 (16.6%) of his 0.75 salary benefit which is -you guessed it - 12.5% of his full salary. So the only difference to you is if he works longer he might get more raises and have a higher base salary.
So if his 20 year pension is $2700 a month, you get 25 % of that or $675. If he works for 30 years and gets $4050 a month, you get 16.6% of that or $672 a month. Basically you get the same no matter how long he works.
