Congratulations on your new little cub Wolfman!!! I’m with the others on here...try to turn it into a positive experience. Your son will take his cues from you.
Sorry to hear about your missed events with your D. I agree with you. It is disgusting and extremely narcissistic of your XW to go to these lengths to keep you out of your D’s life. Hopefully things will turn around sooner rather than later. In the meantime, focus on making great memories with your other two.