Thanks DNJ. Just good, solid advice.

Bttrfly - not sure where to get Britbox but I’ll look into it.

I am zero contact with my ex-MLCer; we rarely text and only about kids. Recently I was under the weather and told the kids they should stay with him an extra day or two just so that I was not passing anything to them. My ex texted me saying he had $$ plans the following day and needed 24 hours notice to cancel and not lose money. (I bet this is his way of saying he has another woman in the wings.). He asked is he thought I should cancel. He still has not told me he divorced his affair partner. So I said, sorry to disrupt you and your wife’s plans but I would cancel. He thanked me but then he said “as you know, I have been divorced a year now. But thanks for the ‘sentiment’.” I guess my kids told him I knew.

I decided to have some fun and said something like “oh, your marriage and divorce all happened so fast, who can possibly keep track of it all. We all are taking bets on when you will have wife #3.” I fully expected him to spew.

Instead he joked. He asked what theodds were as he might want part of the action.

I told him most of us agreed he was already married to wife #3. But we thought this time he decided to keep it a secret from everyone, even his own kids. Then I said that I had bet he married wife 3 at the courthouse while he filed for for divorce from wife #2. Maybe she was even a clerk there?

I fully expected him to just rage.

But he wrote back “ha ha. That is pretty good actually.” He then said wife 2 was good for him but the relationship with the kids was strained. So it was an easy choice after that. Then he said tell the bet makers there will not be a wife 3 til our younger son graduates and leaves for college. Then he said signing off (his way of getting the last word.)

Interesting that he felt the need to tell me she was a good choice for him. Suuurrrre. We always divorce people in 5 months who are good choices. Wink wink.

I found it interesting that this is the first conversation in years where he did not spew and where there was some semblance of a sense of humor.


Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13
BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself
BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room"
8/15: H back to MBR
10/15: H back in dorm room
1/18: H files, now divorced