[Steve_]

I do not agree with some of the things posted here. But I know had I stuck to the advice when I first came I would be wayyyy better off than I am not and a lot farther along. But it is what it is. I had to go through my journey. I do understand broken attracts broken, I get that 100%. I know I am not okay, and there will be times seeing my ex gets to me. But I will bat down that mirage of whatever it is quick through reality, history and prayer. I’m not turning back. And sure sometimes I would want to, but she isn’t even offering and again, I know it would not be ever what I could have with someone better. I would be settling and nobody should ever settle. People come into our lives as blessings or lessons and my ex was a lesson, a really hard hitting one.

I will take things with this gal very very slow. It’s good that I won’t see her more than a couple days a month. She is invested in school for 2 years down there she just started. I need to get my next better job and really get myself into a better living Sitch that I am comfortable with. Sure it’s [censored] to have a long distance R but I think it’s actually a blessing because most of what we have is communication and time. And if I end up making it with this girl it will be in the most healthy way. There will be no way to jump-start anything here. I will not move away and she will not chance her life plan. We agreed on that before the second date. We both know we got work to do, and to be responsible and healthy we will take our time, do what makes one another happy, discuss anything that doesn’t and be realistic about our expectations here. Personally for me I have none of her. I cannot have any of anyone or I will be doomed to repeat NGS over again. And I won’t. I will be extremely cautious. But for what I have seen thus far everything is good. We will see if anything changes.