Piggybacking of what CW asked, does your S have an issue with exchanging at the police station or does it just bother you? I think, as CW pointed out, it is actually a good opportunity for your son to get to know the police and see what they do and how they help people. I get that it bothers you but you should try to act as if it is really not a big deal and if you can have that vibe then son will be more at ease.

As for your XW's reaction (or possible over-reaction) to your new child, it will be what it will be and you can only control how YOU handle things and interact with people. You can't control what she's going to do or say. I'm still unclear, though, on why you are even talking to her about anything other than the bare minimum necessities required to co-parent your two shared children. Mind you, what I'm about to say is NOT from my own experience because my XH and I didn't share any children so I have not had the ordeal you do, but I've seen many on here talk about only interacting through email or text or some sort of calendar app so there is written proof of exactly what is said and there is no interpretation or anything. Just simple, basic, perfunctory communication: "I will meet you at police station at 6:00 on June 1 to get S. D is welcome if she would like to come." If she tries to respond with some diatribe beyond that, do NOT engage. It takes 2 to tango.


Me 52, H53
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
6 grandkids