I don't want a divorce II NEW THREAD pt 30

[KitCat]

A week or so later I asked about something random to him. I get multiple text messages back. About how he just wants to move on and how he sees all these "bad" signs when he has been in my town many months ago. Now, all but 1 visit he was here on his own personal business or that of OW... I got descriptions of how he was cut off in traffic, how he was rear ended, how he had been run off the road, ((and the one visit regarding me --- he arrived in town for court date and it had been postponed of which I had not been notified either, so a waste of his time.)) THIS ^^^^ This is the reason he will not consider recon, though that is not what I was texting him about... its just what came out of his mouth.

Curious as to what was important to text him to where it is turned into a relationship talk where he just reaffirmed to you that you are not good enough?

I had mentioned his D19. That resulted in multiple texts first about how his D19 made her bed and she can lie in it which is a huge change from him when he dropped off the dog in March when he was the one to talk about his D19.

I did not respond to his text about his D19. He continued to rattle off texts.

I did not respond.

But he was looking to recon... they could have been good signs... when I am not with you I get run off the road... when I am not with you nothing goes my way.

You have never given him the time or the space to remember the good times.

I am sadly aware of this

This man was soooo happy to have randomly run into me on the highway that he was texting multiple times --- that he thinks he just saw me on X road 20min ago... was it me??? Wouldn't then that be GOOD sign making all those other signs months ago fade in comparison???

I think you really have blown that incident way out of proportion.

I was being sarcastic.... seeing how he was going on and on about all the "bad" signs... wouldn't this be a "good" one???

I feel your pain.

Yet you do not do anything to detach from it.

Detaching and letting go is a process. I'm much more at emotional neutral than I have been. I don't immediately respond to reply to his texts. I often don't even ready them for at least 24hr. When I respond its 5 words or less.

My STBXH texted that he is filling his life with healthy relationships with the best of friends and occasionally family so much so that he has finally quit smoking. ((he had quit when we met and got together... but stress of his job, his kids and being tired all the time he fell back into it... I was angry over it and pulled away. I tried to find a neutral place where I did stop nagging for the last 2yr... sigh))

So now you have him texting you how wonderful his life is without you. That must feel amazing (insert LH eyeroll)

That was part of the multiple texts he sent when first talking about his D19. I didn't ask. I certainly didn't respond. And... no... it completely [censored] that he is soooo happy without me. But it is what it is.

My atty sent a rough draft of our dissolution 2 weeks ago... I haven't been able to even look at that email.