Relationship with XW hasn't changed much. I make sure the kids are available when and if she asks to see them, etc. This has averaged about once out of every 10 days or so, usually only for an hour or two at a time. XW still stuck in the tunnel, drinking, smoking pot, going to see her boyfriend and his band play, etc.
I do not ever text or contact her first, and when she texts I do not respond unless its relevant to the kids or if there's a question asked. She got snippety recently regarding COVID vaccination for S12. We discussed via text (so I had in it writing) getting him vaccinated and mutually agreed to get him the vaccine, if he wanted it, which he did. Once that was decided, I went ahead and scheduled it. She sent me a nasty text saying that "she's still his mother" (this is her go-to line, "I'll always be their mother), and "it would have been nice if you told me about it so I knew." I simply responded that we had discussed this issue and mutually agreed to get him vaccinated. In my opinion, discussing plans and experiences with our sons is no longer a part of our relationship post-D. It's a boundary I won't cross.
I have been dating someone for the last 5 months and it's been absolutely awesome thus far. It's nice to be with someone who understands your value and doesn't take you for granted. Really amazing how things have changed for the better over the last 22 months, and it's only looking up from here.
I still check in with the board and follow many of your sitches. Keep your head up, everyone, and know that you are here primarily because of your MLC spouse, not because you are deficient in any way. Keep moving forward and working on yourself!
