Yes, it hurts. Deeply. I truly loved this man. I believed he was a different person than who he has shown himself to be in our marriage and with his affair. Maybe I was manipulated. Maybe I was blind. Maybe I just saw things through rose colored glasses. Honestly, in having no support (and even more pressure) when I felt my worst and needed him the most was a pretty big wakeup call to something being really wrong in the marriage. All the learning is validating and bringing to light more evidence of serious flaws that need to be acknowledged and not ignored.
I'm sorry you've had to go through this, Elbereth, I love how much thought you're putting into the distinction between re-writing history and seeing history more objectively.
