I just responded to her that way simply because throughout this process I never stood up to her, I blamed myself, I never looked her in the eye and told her how I actually felt. I will NOT be saying anything more, but I did feel at that point for once I needed to just say "listen, say whatever you want, do whatever you want, but we ALL saw how things went including the children, so dont try to turn this around now, you made your choice I just accept it now" I felt like I could not move on without at least telling her that. I did it in a respectful manner. She told me "the kids are destroyed by your choice, D5 feels like her heart is cracking that you gave up" yada yada yada... I saw right through it, she has no desire to work on this M or change her WW ways. She just wanted me to hurt for standing up for myself and being done with this crap. I know better than that, she WILL NEVER CHANGE. and I CAN NEVER GO BACK AND FIX THIS. I know that. I really do. It took me a long long time to accept it, but I have. Even if a miracle were to happen and she was able to turn her life around the process would take years, and I am not willing to waste more years I could be happy with someone else that would be loyal and honest and deserving to give my WW a chance to grow up. She had her shot, many many shots and she blew them all. That is on her, and even then I held on far longer than most, now I have no regrets and I can lay my head down at night, I can look my kids in the eye, and go through this storm knowing that I gave it my all and that is good enough for me. That is all I wanted.
I know this will be hard, and the 8 months now of being legally seperated were not the full spectrum of this change because I refused to see them/ treat them that way. I do realize there will be dark days ahead, and I will stand-fast by my choice to put my happiness and my children's well being before anything the WW throws at me. I will not buckle, I cannot. I have finally come to a point where the line in the sand has been drawn, and just like when I was in the military for so many years, I will not accept defeat and return to complacency. I have done too much work, come too far, I expect to receive the same level of intrest, honor and commitment that I put into my R's, anything less I will not tolerate, and I don't need to. I need no-one. When god decides it is time for me to find a partner he will place on on my path. I will not date, I will not get apps or go to bars any of that. I put my future partner in god's hands to deliver, until then I will simply take care of myself and my kids and face this storm with dignity.
Last edited by Steve_; 05/08/2105:22 PM.
T:11 M:10 K: D5, S7 BD: 9/1/20 WW continues to break up and recon with OM. I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021 Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21. Glad my D was not busted.
