It was MLC. Now I am calling moving forward.

[Wolfman]

Hi Wolf,

I'm sorry to hear about this turn for the worse.

My son was at my house and said a little and nothing was wrong. But my ex kept him at her house on my day, saying his allergies were bad. And the woman interviewed him again. This time he said my gf was mean to him, yells at him, and the best one she never lets him and I have time alone.

Wolf, I'm going to share something personal. My first visit from CPS was in 5th grade, and my parents persuaded me to lie to cover up their crimes. When they asked how I was punished, instead of relaying a near-death experience, I told them an anecdote my parents made up and had me practice until I sounded convincing. "Well, there was one time I wouldn't do my chores, and my parents wouldn't let me have a Snickers bar. That was so wrong!" Why did I lie, besides being 10? They said if I told CPS the truth, I'd be taken away and sent to a home in a neighborhood with gangs and drug dealers. A shout out to my 5th grade teacher for being the first to see I was abused.

So, coaching is a thing. 1. CPS always interviewed me out of earshot of my parents. When you say what was said where, are these assumptions, or they released a report with those details? 2. If they released a report, what did they say about mom and mom's house and mom's bf? 3. If they released a report, what are they recommending? CPS tends to prefer corrective action over long-term removal. 4. Do you think S went along with it because he doesn't want to see GF anymore? At 10, per the above, my reasoning was beyond, "Because Mom said so!"

I wonder if there's some "no contest" option where you don't admit guilt, but simply take a parenting class and ensure your kids get to see you WITHOUT seeing your girlfriend and life gets back to normal.

Thank you for sharing that. I can answer those questions for you. Only the lawyers got to see the report. My lawyer is the one who told me what my kids said. They didn’t tell me what was said about moms home or her, my guess is probably nothing bad or else they would have told me. No recommendations yet. When the woman form CPS came my gf was not here she was at work. So, the judge said they need to come back and vet her too. I just know it was coached I will tell you why. Yesterday after I picked up my son from the police station and I was driving home, I asked him If he was happy coming to my home. He said most of the time. I said ok can you tell my why sometimes you don’t like to come. He said because my gf is mean to him and she yells at him a lot and she thinks she is my mom. I said I understand why that would make you feel that way. Can you give me examples when she yelled at you? He gave me an example where a year ago we were going out and his hair was a mess. I asked him numerous times to do his hair and he kept refusing. I was being so calm and patient, but no joke after 30 minutes of being patient I raised my voice, because now we were going to be late to where we were going. So my gf raised her voice too, (I am telling you all honestly here it really wasn’t a big deal) and said s we are late we have to go. She even offered to help him with his hair multiple times before we both got loud. By the way we winded up being 45 minutes late to where we needed to go because of him taking so loNg to do his hair. I asked him what was the other time. He said there was no other time, that was it. I said you sure? I just want to be able to fix these problems. He said that was it. I also told him, she is not your mom, you only have one mom, gf loves you and she loves to be with you and she was just trying to help you that day with your hair.So, he told the CPS woman she yells at him all the time, when it was a kinda once a year ago. I also asked how is she mean? He said she just is. I said I understand you feel that way can you give me an example? He responded, “ I don’t know, she just is.” I said an example would really help me figure out how we can make this better. Again, he said I don’t know she is. I said you can’t think of one example of how she is? He said no. I said ok. Thank you for letting me know these things. There was more we were going to talk about but by this time we got home and his allergies were acting up so I needed to help him with that.
I have a question. I recoded a little of the conversation to show my lawyer. Where we talk about that she only yelled at him once. Should I record more of this. And if so, will this help me show that when he was there he was so quick and open about bashing me. Second how ironic that I was supposed to have my son, but she didn’t give him to me that day when CPS showed up.
Now my gf is petrified of my s. Since we are having the baby in a week and CPS is involved in our life she is terrified that the lies he says could take our newborn away. Honestly, I completely understand where she is coming from.