I think you asked him to lunch as a last ditch Hail Mary so to speak. I think you were hoping going to court would wake him up and he wouldn’t want to get divorced and seeing you immediately afterwards might be the push to get him to come back. There’s no other reasonable explanation. You said you don’t wanna be friends, so that’s not the angle. You didn’t need to do any of that to maintain dignity or grace, so it can’t be that either.
My question is solely this....why can’t you be single? You are still trying to get your H to come back while missing the pilot whom you can’t forget months later after a few dates. I think you have codependency issues.
I think you’re gonna be stuck in this mind (bleep) of a situation until you get professional help. And no that’s not an insult and no that doesn’t make you weak.
You have justified being abused, justified your behavior with pilot, justified really everything that holds you back, and refuse to get professional help. Do you believe there is a some stigma to it? Like is someone or yourself going to call you crazy?
You need professional help. You really do and that’s not a bad thing. I’m so sorry you seem to think it is. Most people don’t have a bad experience and quit all together the way you have therapy. And it’s only hurting you while everyone else is moving on in your life.
Me: 40 EX:37 Together 17 years Married 16 years 5 kids, 20,18,15,14,11
