I can totally relate to what you are saying Bob. My XH was engaged and a new home owner within seven months of BD...and we do have kids... kids that he introduced OW to three months before BD. So to answer your question... no, I don’t think we ever really truly know someone. Like your XW, the person my XH was when I married him, no longer exists. You are lucky, in some ways, that you didn’t have kids as you are able to move forward and have very little, if any contact with your X. I think that helps with the healing process. Having said that, time is a great healer regardless. In my sitch, XH has been super reasonable with the business end of our split so we have been able to establish a pretty positive co-parenting situation. And OW is very good to my kids so I think we are doing as well as we possibly can given the circumstances. XH was over at my house yesterday dropping some planters off (he and OW have bought me out of my share of the home I co-own with his mom so are moving in once they sell their home and pay me) and we had a funny, lighthearted conversation about our kids and the logistics of the move(s). It was nice and bodes well for our kids that we are in that place. Three years ago, I would have never predicted that and yet here we are. Life is good. And in a weird way, I AM glad that it happened because the life I lead now would have never happened if it hadn’t. It’s not the life I planned but it may turn out to be an even better one. I hope yours does too. (((HUGS)))
