I am not detached, Pack19 part4

[LH19]

For example, she would get an email in German where the real state company requests our approval of the next payment by the bank and she would forward it to me out of nowhere asking me if all is fine and how the payments are going.

Yes. The payments are on time.

Now please understand this, for the first year of our S I would answer all these emails in a kind way and trying to inform her. Did it help me? No. Did it change the way she used any chance to remind me of all my fault? No. I have heard many times here I was trying to nice my way back and it was never going to work.

You can't nice her back and you can't mean her back.

Now I try to be a strong man, never going against anyone but trying to protect and defend what I have so hard worked for, and you tell me I have not changed. Please help me understand how a mature and detached man would handle this, I dont want to show her a man at her feet anymore.

See my response above. Think of her like a business partner when it comes to finances. Just the facts.

She left our home, regardless of whether I could pay or not the mortgage, she told me to stay in Germany as far as possible from her and the kids and she threatened me with a miserable life in order to get the kids back to Spain.

And yet you still want her back.

All I am doing is defending my position as a man, you wanted nothing to do with our house, how come now a year and a half later you are very interested. I am trying to change LH, for the better, but I dont think I want her to see any change anymore, after all she has done, if she ever was to come to me I dont know what I would think. I hope I have explained myself and you all can offer some guidance.

Well then file for D and move on.

I guess that was hurt talking. [quote=LH19]
Learn to master your emotions and this will not happen in the future.
[quote=Pack_19] I sent her a first email telling her I would handle all linked to the payments of the house, which I have been doing in terms of payments and paperwork since she left. Then she replied to that telling me she must be informed about everything. To that email I replied that I would not avoid any communication between her and our financial advisor but not to expect any information from my side. Then she sent a new email insisting I inform her and then is when I replied in that mistaken way.

W feel free to contact X at this email address for that information.

I feel like I have been humiliated enough during this situation LH. All the times she has said I destroyed our M, all the times she has accused me of having jealousy issues, the way she has pushed me out of her life as if I meant nothing, all the days I have to say goodbye to my children and go out running to avoid crying at home. I dont want to be childish or vindictive in any way. I just want to show her a man that has principles, sticks to them and expects respect.

Give her the D she wants and go live an amazing life. It's really that simple.

But where is the line? What emails am I suppose to answer and what can I ignore?

Come on man you know the answer to this but I will give it to you one more time. Questions about the kids or finances. Be brief and to the point. Ignore everything else.