Or is it that men want a strong woman, but once they have one, they resent the strength and try to pull you down to their level?
That sounds similar to the notion that most women seek a "Bad Boy", and then try to change/tame him? I think there are many, many men out there who would accept and celebrate your strength. Strength is awesome! My last ex was strong (world-class athlete, Harvard professor)--and quite the opposite, I loved it and enjoyed being challenged and wanted to support her growth and accomplishments. It was her who wanted to hold me down, whenever my performance threatened to outshine hers.
Originally Posted by Elbereth
Our courtship was quick, so by the time I saw these things, I was already living with him and fully committed to him. I want to be sure I find a true partner and equal in my next relationship.
You solved your own riddle--we should be slower to go all-in. How do they make us feel? What do they bring out in us? Those questions are as important as attraction, values, and shared interests. If we can have a great life solo, what's the rush to go all-in with someone? I know the odds for second marriages are worse than for first marriages, but I feel great optimism based on all we've learned.
