I respect you for taking the step-parent role seriously. Some parents don't prioritize their biological kids, and here you are prioritizing kids that aren't even yours biologically. That's brilliant and beautiful.
Originally Posted by Elbereth
I know he appreciated me doing it, but he didn't allow me to help raise the boys...shutting down my ideas or feelings even in front of them. I think he took every opinion, idea, feeling as somehow me saying he was/is a poor father.
I'm ashamed to say I treated one of my ex-GFs similar to the way your ex-H treated you. I resented her trying to be my kids' step-mom. Is it possible, instead of feeling threatened, that dynamic was at play in your relationship? I mean to say he wanted you as "wife" but not as "step-mom" and you taking on that role bothered him? In my case, some of that ex-GF's values weren't in-line with my own.
