It was MLC. Now I am calling moving forward.

[Ready2Change]

Hi wolf. Sorry to hear about the status of things.

I had court yesterday and what a disaster.....2 weeks ago she filed a petition for sole custody....my daughter as suicide ideation....that I am mentally and emotionally abusive to my children....physically abused her in front of the kids....that I encourage my GF to belittle and put my children down.

If my X was doing any of those things, I would never drop the charges as part of the negotiations. I can assume other parents here would agree with me.

her lawyer said she will drop the petition if we drop ours. My ex has 42 contempt’s of court (42 days I was supposed to have my daughter and didn’t) plus me going for custody because I have screen shots of how my ex bashed me to my daughter. My lawyer dropped ours too,

These actions do not line up with someone concerned about the well being of the child.

her lawyer and my child’s lawyer said my daughter needs a break from me so they all agreed 2 weeks would be good for my daughter. So for the next 2 weeks I am not to see or contact my daughter.

This concerns me.

I have a question for all of you. I have spoke to a bunch of friends about my daughter. She is 13 do I just completely back off after the 2 weeks and wait for her to “wake” up and come to me or do I continue to force the issue?

This depends on how important your relationship with your daughter is to you. Since you dropped the contempt claims, you may have a harder time getting parenting time. Stick to your agreement about the two weeks and do not initiate and contact with your daughter. DURING THAT TIME, get your lawyer to confirm the first exchange with her lawyer (following whatever the current agreement is).

This is negotiation between the parents with the lawyers doing the talking. Parents set the rules and the children follow them. IF the parents disagree, then the legal system helps make the decisions. This is your to lose. That is what my lawyer told me. Wolf, your behavior will dictate how this comes out.

Do I let this go or do I refile and maybe get a new lawyer? Thanks

The lawyer is working for you. You are paying him to present you side of the story in the best light to the court system. Is he doing that?



Do not let fear control you. Make decisions based on WHAT IS BEST FOR YOUR KIDS. Make decisions based on what is the RIGHT THING TO DO. That will most likely be the harder path for you.


My belief is the best things for the kids is to be in frequent contact with both of their parents. You have a special case, but you are the only one that can truly determine if that statement is true for your kids. Do you believe your kids need a relationship with their mother? Are you both toxic to your kids? Or maybe the way you interact?


Only you can reflect on everything that has happened in the past and change your behavior for the better.

If I was in your shoes, I would REQUEST that an independent profession observe both you and your wife during the exchanges and parenting time. If you are a good dad, that person will see that.


Parenting is hard work. Your job as a parent is to set and enforce boundaries. Rewarding positive behavior with freedom and bigger responsibilities. Restricting things when they act irresponsible. There is a balance. The older the children become the more autonomous they are to become. Setting them free at 18 to make good life decisions is the goal.


I wish you well my friend.

Regards,

R2C