I have immersed myself in my own life (GAL) and just bought a house - that happens to be down the street from mutual friends of ours. I bought it mostly for me 65% me and I am admitting to myself that my hope is that maybe it could be our new home. The home I am currently in is rented and has a lot of memories I want to leave behind.
I am growing more aware each week, tending to my own emotions, learning to focus more on me, creating a less distractive life.
I realized my super power is multi-tasking, providing and achieving. I didn't know how to be emotionally available because I wasn't doing that for myself.
I have been kind and brief with A and she has noticed.
I have stood up for myself on one occasion when she got somewhat verbally aggressive. I later told her calmly that I don't want us to have conversations when we are unregulated and laid out a brief plan on what we can do the next time. I am working on my nice guy.
She ask to schedule an "introduction to mediation" with a mediator and I am a little triggered by it at the moment internally but also perhaps its a chance for me to feel how much I've grown as she takes steps.
When I told her I bought a house I made it clear that I bought it for our daughter and I. She replied that she was happy for me and that she knows I've been wanting that for awhile. She also said that she wants to buy a house next year.
These comments of her expressing her own sovereignty do make me sad.....and I am continuing to recover and forge ahead.
I'm not following Sandi rules to a "T"......as she sometimes exchanges text messages that are light and somewhat engaging and I sometime engage.
