1) Immediately stop distracting yourself from you, and the healing and work you need to do with ridiculous dating books and dating apps. CW can attest to this I have dozens upon dozens of books to recommend if you're looking for some self improvement reading that deal with what you really need to be addressing here. But I'm sorry you need to get in IC, and you need to take a very serious inventory of where you are right now mentally and emotionally and take action on that, not drowning out the pain and fear with distractions. You're supposed to grow through this disaster not wander your way into your own MLC.
2) Not to kick a man when he's down but you're fooling your self if you think there's a single self help book out there written by a middle aged straight man that's going to help you with with dating women. Any women. Even middle aged straight women. When you're in a place to actually date you shouldn't even need a book on that, but if you do I have recommendations for that too.
3) Another Stander or R2C one of the older vets has a whole list of books on here some where in the newbie threads that are recommended reading. That's another list of books you should seriously consider before that dating bunk. Maybe I can find it and link it here. There's a lot of good stuff on there, I know there's few about the distancer pursuer dynamic and a bunch of other stuff on relationships and self improvement. If anybody else had a better recall on it or can link it faster by all means, I'd take the help
