Yeah you guys are right, I did get the app just to chit chat with people. I guess I thought interaction with others would help me feel less isolated. But I am nowhere close to dating anyone. I thought I would feel better to feel "normal" again and be able to start over just talking to a stranger about random everyday life stuff. So far out of 5 matches they want a husband or to have you take them out and pay for them. Yep, was a bad idea. Just deleted the account. I suppose I was trying to find a way to not be so lonely, but that is selfish of me to do, waste peoples time when I dont want anyone.
Im just gonna focus back on the gym, kids, work and so forth. The lonliness I will eventually get used to and be okay with. A dating app is not a good healthy distraction I gotta do this until I get to point where im actually okay alone at least 6 more months from now probably longer. (thats what my therapist friend said) I guess a lot of people have pushed me to go out and see other girls and "move on" sort of felt like if I didnt I was a loser. But actually I feel wrong about even putting myself out there since I am not even close to available inside. Now that I think about it, im still trying to do too much to avoid the pain of all this. I just gotta face reality, this is gonna be crappy for a long time, no cutting around it.
Thanks guys, I felt like it might be a bad idea but all my buddies at work pushed me to do it, said "just try" okay, I tried, not feeling it. Other than that everything else is fine.
T:11 M:10 K: D5, S7 BD: 9/1/20 WW continues to break up and recon with OM. I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021 Default Dissolution granted 8/5/21. Glad my D was not busted.
