New M, new WAW

[LH19]

After mulling it over for a good couple weeks, the other day I wrote her a last love letter, explaining how I felt through the past 12 years of knowing her. I know this is not in line with DBing, and one might call it a slip up but I don't think it was. It was something I needed to do for myself as I haven't always expressed my feelings to her all that well. I had no expectations of reconciliation so the intention was not pursuit, it came from another place, I don't know.

Truthfully this letter should have been sent later IMO but no biggie as long as you are truthful that you had zero expectations.

Got a job, got new friends, and the past month (since BD) she's been happy. Spending time with friends, dating (?), growing.

Yep thats how they all feel in the beginning of the break up/divorce

She said if I want to be with her I need to change without her.

That you your royal heinous lol.

She discussed various faults and that I need to go to therapy to address them.

Do you agree with these faults?

That only after we find ourselves could we think about a partnership again.

This sounds like typical WW bs.

The man she wants is confident, driven, and affectionate.

Hmmmm. Right out of "How to be a 3% man" Wonder why Ginger hates this book?

She mentioned twice, at the start and the end, that therapy will not fix the M, and she's not going to wait around to see if I can do these things or not.

Yep it takes two to want to fix it.

I responded basically thank you for pointing out these things, I'm not happy about where my life is right now, I know I need to make changes and I am going to do so. It was longer than that but probably didn't have to be.

Yep. It's all about the ACTIONS now.

I was surprised she even acknowledged the possibility of a future R.

Please try to forget she never said that. Most likely throwing you a bone to string you along for a bit.

I wonder, when I get there, if she will be the one I want.

Probably not. You will be better so why would you settle for a quitter?