One foot in front of the other

[Elbereth]

Update. Had a convo with my L today. Still hoping to get the agreement signed and then we will start the D process on paper next week. I do hope it stays civil and doesn't get dragged out or super expensive, but I feel I have no choice but to use a L now that H has been taking funds and hiding things from me.

Feeling a bit lighter the last day or so. I think just making the decision to D helps. Even though it's not what I really wanted...I do not want to live like this any longer than I have to. If I am really going to move forward, I want my own place and my own financial freedom to do what I want.

I really wish I could just put everything in storage and go travel for a year. H hated traveling, and I have wanted to do it more. So embracing that would bring me joy as well as distract me from the awful last few years. I would feel empowered and excited to travel. And hell, I'm not getting younger.