#18 - Still working 2 years into Ring & Piecing

[SteveLW]

Watched The Break-up last night. It is a 2006 movies starring Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston. They are a couple (not married) sharing a condo in Chicago. They have a big blow up and break up, but continue with an IHS. I had watched some college basketball earlier so I thought I would go ahead and watch this movie since I was interested in the subject matter.

I thought that they dealt with the dynamics in these kinds of things fairly well. I thought that they showed how the manipulation attempts and passive-aggressive tactics some couples use on each other to make the other jealous, or get them to come back to the R were pretty realistic. It showed that manipulation attempts usually back-fire on you, and that passive-aggressiveness actually leads to the other person being less attracted to you not more.

There was a scene near the end of the movie where Jennifer Aniston invites Vince Vaughn to a concert trying to get back together (after the condo is being sold and they have two week to move out), and he stands her up. The next morning he goes to her room to find her crying, and she has the heart-to-heart with him that she should have had with him instead of the big blow-up that started the whole mess. I thought this was also well done because it showed that by time the one "spouse" is ready to really confront the real issues in the R, it is usually too late and the dynamics of the R are such that the damage has been done, too much toothpaste is out of the tube, and trying to put it all back together again is probably futile at that point.

In that scene, Vince's character, after Jennifer's tells him exactly why she had been unhappy, says "Why didn't you ever say that?" She says: "I did try to say that so many times." And he says: "Yeah, but never like that." But since he just stood her up for the concert she is no longer interested in trying, she is tired of being hurt.

Anyway, just wanted to share these observations. I know movies like this play things up to be funny and entertaining, but at its heart there was a lot of realism and truth. LBHs I do not suggest running out and putting a pool table in the dining room as a show of power! LOL And LBWs, getting a "wax" and parading around naked to make him jealous probably isn't a good tactic either.