Still taking it a day at a time (2)

[Elbereth]

Sometimes I try to imagine what I’d try to do in my sitch if it were at the point yours is now. I do feel like I’d feel many of the same feelings you’ve had/are having. Totally understandable considering what you’ve gone through. I think once I recognized my focusing on aspects of things (what’s going right or wrong or my own expectations), I think I would recognize myself doing that and try to “just let things flow”. That is what is hardest for me as I am the type of person who wants to feel in control. I don’t always adjust to things changing or not going my way. But I’m learning in my self inspection journey that I’ve gotten in my own way many times.

And, like the rest of the process, you can’t really control the outcome of your piecing or M 2.0 beyond your own actions and attention to the relationship. Have you tried to just flow with it, and try moving those expectations from your head for even just a week. Then try to evaluate the week after it’s over? This is something I’ve been trying to do, to try to get more comfortable with what I can’t control as well as to avoid the dwelling of things that has been my way for so long. Other than just this recent period I’m in, I think it’s helped me. I find I spend less time dwelling on things when the period has ended versus dwelling on what hasn’t even happened yet. If that makes any sense.

Anyway, not sure if any of this sounds helpful. Sending you hugs and kudos for how far you have already come.