I understand you don't want to focus on bad things that happened in the past, but you should have initially told us she had cheated on you. It significantly changes the picture, IMHO. We spent many months viewing this as a WAW sitch!
All this time you have been obsessed with her (b/c she rejected you), and you couldn't understand why she would act the way she does. Why couldn't you have just been honest with us?
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I reacted in the absolute opposite way. I was thinking, she does not deserve me and I am not going to tolerate this from anyone in my life.
That's exactly the way you should have handled it this time!
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
