New M, new WAW

[mako]

Yesterday we went (well, went on Zoom) to a mediator to start figuring out the splitting of property. We have done an excellent job in saving over the years which is great, but it's going to be annoying to basically cut the pie in half to support two households. I have outlined what I think is fair and she has been mostly receptive so far but hasn't been specific about the larger things so we'll see. Custody will be 50-50, I will still need to pay child support because I make a lot more than her, this is set by statute so that's easy to figure out at least. Alimony is iffy but at the very least it would most likely be short term. Again, we'll see. My stomach was in knots all day as this is just another step closer to D. More detachment needed.

We have been pleasant to each other so that's good, a lot of sitch's seem to have a lot of meanness in them but we are doing ok there. We both work at home but in different parts of the house (which we've done the past year anyway) so we don't see each other much unless we get lunch at the same time. At night she mostly just hangs out in our room so I hang out with the kids and then do my own thing when they go to bed. We are still in the same bed. As I noted above, I've always been of the idea that she can leave if she chooses but I am not leaving the bed. She slept in a different room the first night then came back.

This is how I feel about the house too, I'm not leaving unless we sell it and both leave. She has still been looking at apartments online. We have not planned another house hunting outing

It's been just 10 days since BD and I have lots of conflicting emotions. Like I said, sometimes my stomach is just in knots thinking about all this, and sometimes I'm looking forward to being out on my own and starting fresh.